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Story of my Life, Travel

When Things Didn’t Happen As Expected

It’s frustrating when things don’t turn out the way we hoped and imagined it to happen. Mon was expecting something to happen on his professional career that could have helped him achieve the skills that he needed for his career advancement but unfortunately it was cancelled. Well, that’s life. There are things that we can’t control no matter how hard we try to make it happen, but how we respond to the situation will always depend on us and that’s what matters most. Is it easy to let go and let the universe control over it? Of course not, but life must go on.

When Mon knew that it was cancelled, I could feel how tremendously disappointed he was and he even started to doubt his own capabilities. My role as his wife, is to help him move on from the failed excitement. Perhaps, God has a better plan for him. As they said, if one door closes, another door opens for you which is way better than the first failed opportunity.

I have my own principles on how to overcome disappointments towards failed expectations. I hope this can help you too.

  1. Express your feelings- If you feel sad, angry, hurt or whatever emotions you have towards the unexpected event, be open to express it because that’s a normal human response. One of God’s task to me as Mon’s wife is to be his ears to listen to what his heart feels. Expressing what you feel can help you somehow lighten up the emotional baggage that you’re carrying.
  2. Accept the reality-This is an important step that we need to do for us to move forward. This can help us clear our thoughts to find solutions and actions towards healing our sadness because of our broken dreams.
  3. Love yourself- Don’t be too harsh to yourself whether it was because of your short coming or not, that caused it. Learn to FORGIVE YOURSELF. How can others forgive you if you can’t even do that to your own actions.
  4. Go with the flow- I normally plan out everything in my life and when things go out of control, that is when I get upset about it. But I realized that if I can’t control it , why not let God handle it for me. Life is easier when you’ll learn to let go of things that are beyond your capacity. This is not an easy job for people like me who wants to be in control in every details of my life, but the more you practice it, the more you’ll get used it.
  5. Learn from it-Every failure that we experienced is an opportunity for us to learn something new. We may need to use a different approach next time if our previous course of action failed. “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”- Albert Einstein

Disappointments are indeed an open gate for us to learn more about ourselves and can help us to realize the things that we need to improve on to reach our dreams. Keep dreaming and make it happen!

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Live♥Love♥Laugh♥

Mich

8 Comments

  1. This is so true! Thank you for this post. I need to remember this often. I too am the type to plan everything and when things don’t go as planned it messes me up big time.

  2. I love your perspective. Dealing with the disappointment of expectations not coming to fruition, takes a lot of grace

  3. cfaulkner2411

    I love your breakdown of your coping mechanisms. I think a lot of times the reason why people cope so terribly is because they cannot break it down on their own. I am sure this is going to help a lot of your readers!

  4. Great advice! Where were you a month ago!? Just kidding, but that’s where I was. It’s a huge hit to your heart and ego when things don’t work out. I hope he’s handling it well, and I’m certain when we work hard, even when we don’t get something we’re confident in, it sucks something more is waiting for us. Good luck to him and you!

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